the most unexpected people always end up making appearances in my life at the most unexpected of times.

my creative writing professor from second year added me on facebook right before i left for europe.  i was and am still amazed that he actually remembered me, because there were 100+ students in that class and i never really participated in his class, excluding that one time at the end of the year when i made an announcement to the class, regarding this (at the time, nameless) online magazine i was hoping to start with shanene, in hopes that we’d get a few writing submissions.  when the class ended, he gave me his e-mail address and told me to send him an e-mail as soon as our first issue was online.  i e-mailed him and he responded back, telling me that he was really impressed by it etc… and i hadn’t heard from him since, until recently.  after i got home, about a half an hour ago, i saw that i had a ton of notifications and that he had gone on a crazy liking spree of quite a few of my photos and afterwards, he sent me a really kind message, asking me how i was doing and complimented me on my photos.  his class was by far the most enjoyable class i have taken in my three years of university and i have taken a lot of classes.  regardless, i always wonder what kinds of impressions i leave people with and whether or not we’ll ever cross paths again and under what circumstances.

paradoxicalsentiments:

it makes me a bit sad that our default response to “how are you?” is along the lines of, “I’m well, and you?” it’s like we are programmed to say that and in effect, programmed to lie. more often than not, we are not well. we aren’t fine. but admitting that to anyone else would not only risk disclosing personal information and make us feel vulnerable, but it would mean admitting something we deny to ourselves. and not many people are able to do that.

i think about this a lot and how we’ve become conditioned to conceal our feelings to avoid making the other person feel a sense of discomfort or unease.  and it saddens me, because i wonder how many problems could be solved if we simply just opened up to others more often, as opposed to constantly being afraid of negative judgment or criticism.

and of course, right after i proclaim to have found “happiness,” things immediately begin to spiral downhill… :(

things:

• i need to start taking “photography” more seriously.  i’ve been staring at all of the 1600+ photos that i took when i was in europe for days now, and i don’t really think i made much of an effort when taking them.  they’re all so mediocre and i feel like the photos i took when i went to europe in 2009 were so much more interesting than these ones.  a few people have talked to me and are interested in setting up shoots with them for fashion-related projects that they have / are looking to expand their portfolios and i’m just really worried that i’m going to disappoint them, because i don’t take the same kind of photos anymore that i took in 2009, when i used to care more. :\
• jialin and i have been talking about wanting to move to NYC or just somewhere away from here and starting our own collective - see this post
• i keep forgetting that FASHION magazine has headquarters in vancouver and i should probably apply for an internship there eventually.
• i’m going to attempt to do another writing 365 this summer, because i didn’t quite succeed in 2010, when i made it half-way through. 
• jialin is now an official intern at freckled!
• i need to start looking for a second job ASAP.
• a representative from numa models called me earlier today and wants to meet me for an interview next week. o_o

ahhh, thank you so much, tiffany!  that really means a lot and the same goes for you, of course!  and hey, you have come so far as well!  i really hope that you’ll start your own magazine someday, because i know it will be wonderful.  i wish you all the luck in the world in finding success and happiness. :)